Are you celebrating Father’s Day today?
Most of the western world celebrates Father’s Day today whereas other countries and cultures celebrate such a day at different times of the year.
Initially, I found the concept of having a special day for fathers a bit strange – in my Indian culture, it’s our duty to always respect and honour our fathers and mothers. So I used to wonder why anyone would need a specific day just for that?
However the idea of having an extra-special day with your father is a fun thing to do and I hope that where ever you are, all fathers and their families are having a fabulous day of celebration.
At the same time, I do cringe when I see how commercial such special days have become. You can buy all sorts of specially created gifts for your father and though giving such a gift is a nice gesture, I suggest you be sensible and do not succumb to all the hype around this day.
Honour, appreciate and remember your father for what he does and has done for you.
Spending time with your father and showing your love in a human way is probably the best gift you can him. Tell him how much you love, what he means to you and how much you appreciate all he does for you. And not just today, but every day.
A few weeks ago, I wrote about one should honour and love their mother every day and not just on Mother’s Day.
The same applies to fathers – I mean why would you not honour and love your father every day?
It is over 2 years ago since I lost my own father and it still seems a bit surreal, as it feels like he is still with us, and his essence is all around me. It seems like only yesterday that I received that fateful call in the middle of the night from my mother.
No matter what, he will always be my daddy.
So today is an extra-special opportunity for me to remember him – and yesterday I visited the grounds and gardens where his ashes were scattered. It was quite a poignant visit.
I have previously written at length about losing my father, my grief and my journey since then. For my many new readers, here are my key posts below.
Take your time reading these articles – I have been deeply touched by the many friends who have written to say how much reading these articles has helped with their own grief:-
1. Lessons in compassion from my father
2. Lessons in life and death from my father
3. The first-ever year of my life without my father
4. How to suffer excruciating pain and live again
Looking back over the last 2 years and the grieving period, it is amazing how quickly the time has just flown by. It has been a time of reflection and appreciating what my father did for us and what meant to us.
Father’s day will always be a time to remember just what my father has done for me.
Here’s a very poignant video of a father’s love for his son – it is also a classic example of what the human spirit is capable of. This clip shows all that’s great and noble about being a human being. Believe me – the next 3 minutes will be truly uplifting:
Has there ever been a greater sporting example of the human spirit and fatherly love at the same time?
So on this day, do take some time out to remember also what your father has done for you and continues to do so.
And remember from today onwards to be appreciative and grateful every day for what your father has done for you.
Happy Father’s Day everyone – today and every day.
Arvind, this post touches my heart. I will return to read your posts about your journey of grief and healing when I have time to sit with them and experience your words fully. For now though, this post spoke to me because I love my own father so much and wish to honor him every day, as well. Today I am honoring him with a post on my blog and will surprise him with that when I see him later. We’ll also have pizza together because that is his favorite food. Thank you for this beautiful post.
Thanks Jean for your kind feedback. I hope you had a fabulous day with your father – my father too used to like Pizza but only had some rarely – he was a stickler for chappati, vegetable curry, dhal and rice:-)
Happy father’s day everyday, Jean!
Arvind: What a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing this and your wisdom. I couldn’t agree more that we should always be appreciative and grateful for our parents and all that they have given us. Thanks for sharing that video as well.
Thanks Sibyl for your kind feedback – hope you had a great father’s day:-)
Arvind,
I can see your closeness to your father (and family) from various posts. I too feel that father’s and mother’s should be celebrated everyday and not just once a day. Unfortunately for some, this one day actually gives them time from their kids.
I think many of these holidays have become more commercial sadly. I like celebrating all fathers who were up with their kids teaching how to bike, ball or hang in there when they were down.
ZenGirl, I am grateful for all the good things my Indian culture has given me and one of them is my closeness to my family:-)
And yes a lot of these holidays have become so commercial. The only way around it to be aware of this and spend as much quality time with our loved ones as possible, rather than succumbing to the hype.
Hi Arvind,
I just found your post in my inbox today – the day after Father’s Day. I’m actually glad it’s the day after as I took my mother to my father’s grave yesterday. I think I would have cried more than I’m crying right now if I’d read this yesterday.
The headstone arrived two weeks ago and we hadn’t seen it. It was so sad. I lost my father in Sept. 09 and it still feels surreal to me.
I agree with you though that we should definitely be honouring our Fathers and Mothers all throughout the year, rather than on just one day. But, the one thing that occurs to me is that by having that one very special day it does force us to do something extra on that day. We always had family get-togethers for Father’s Day and cooked lots of Greek foods that my father enjoyed. Watching him enjoy the delicacies and then compliment us all on our cooking was part of the specialness of the day. I will treasure those memories always.
Thank you for making me remember – although it has forced me to use an entire box of tissues to write this!
Dear Angela,
Thanks so much for sharing your poignant story.
Your words touched me deeply and reminded me again of the few days and weeks after the time I lost my father. Those days were very poignant and sad for me and the family, and yet very powerful in reminding us of our loss.
For me too, the loss of my father seemed surreal for many months and even now it still feels strange – it is as if he is still with us and around us. But it does get easier – I know it’s a cliche but time is a great healer.
Yes, having a special day in the calendar for your father (and your mother) does help us to focus on creating something special for them – and those days will then stick out in our memory like it dies for you. Treasure those memories forever.
And Angela, next year, I shall send you a box of tissues:-)
Hello Arvind,
This bought tears to my eyes. I am lucky to have a close family, on mothers day and fathers day we have an agreement that we will spend only a tiny amount of money but have to put a lot of time/effort/thought into the gift. These always mean much more than expensive gifts with little thought behind them.
It is also (another!) reason for my whole family to get together, eat, drink and be merry! So while I agree there is a lot of commercialism, it can be ignored:)
Thanks for your beautiful words,
Kate.
Kate, apologies for bringing tears to your eyes, but I am sure they were tears of gratitude:-)
Thanks for sharing your family’s way of showing real care and love for each other – give each other meaningful rather than expensive gifts – and beat the commercial machine.
Great post. I am uplifted. Thank you for sharing it.
I still have my father. He’s almost 95 years old. He supported 12 of us and modeled high integrity and true abundance and I am forever grateful, mostly for the beingness that he modeled for me.
Purplume, I am glad my aritcle uplifted you.
You are a credit to your father – and I am sure he and your siblings are proud of your writing.
Arvind, This was so touching, and the video was very powerful. My own father died many years ago, but I often think of the influence he had on my life and all that I learned from him.
Madeleine, I am glad you liked the video – it’s something that still affects me deeply everytime I view it again, 4 years after I created it.
Your own father will always be with you and sharing your joys and challenges.
Arvind a respectful, loving passage. You are a credit to your Father who will look down on you with pride especially for all the loving work, support and human contribution you make. The video captures it all for me and brings tears to the eyes. A moving, wonderful tribute post that reminds me of my own father who I always miss and will be part of me everyday until we meet again.
Thanks John, I can feel my father looking down on me right now – and I can also feel myself blushing:-)
In the same way, I am sure your father is looking down on you too – and admiring the steps you are taking to make the world a simple and joyous place.
hi there wonderful messages!!! so to all the wonderful dad’s out there Happy fathers day and enjoy ur day everyday!! takecare ARVIND…
Thanks Lynne for your lovely message of goodwill for all fathers.
Wishing too you all the best.